The Four Biggest Things God Taught Me In Haiti (#2:sex trafficking missions)

2. International Missions With Sex Trafficking Victims

Before this trip, God impressed upon my heart that He would show me something tangible related to the passion God has given me for girls in the sex trafficking industry. To summarize what I wrote about in my day four, part two journal (3/13/13), I met this girl God promised me to meet on the 3^rd day of the youth conference. After we talked about sex and marriage in the girls’ 10-15 age group and encouraged them to tell someone if they were being sexually abused, one of the girls wanted to talk to me one-on-one. Her name was Danielle. She was an 11-year-old with skinny limbs who wore a navy tank top and blue jean skirt; her hair was in twists with white butterfly clips at the ends. While we were walking over to sit by a tree outside the tent, I had a gut feeling or rather a Holy Spirit instinct regarding the topic of this conversation. As the conversation unfolded, I realized the feeling was from God. I found out she has had sex with the wealthier guys (well-off for Haiti) so her family can eat. I consider this circumstantially forced prostitution. Shortly after this part of the conversation began, everything started hitting me, and the tears began to fall like raindrops out of the clouds. God definitely gave me the words to speak in those moments spent with her. I felt more helpless and weak than I ever have in my life. Any good or effective thing I said in that conversation was no doubt from God and an act of God. It was surreal to know one of the very girls I had been praying for over the past two years was sitting here on the Haitian dirt with me, staring into my wet eyes and into my soul with her black pupils surrounded by warm brown in contrast with the whites of her eyes that stood out against her dark, smooth skin. From a bird’s eye view, I imagine Mark, who interpreted, off to the side showing a hint of concern on his face, but, being a man, concealed most of his emotions; Danielle sitting there with what appeared to me as calm curiosity and concern as she listened and watched me cry for her; Then there was me, looking somewhat distraught and pained as I cried and spoke the truth of God. There’s a song called “Love Come to Life” by Big Daddy Weave and in the song it says, “Bring your love to life inside of me. Why don’t you break my heart till it moves my hands and feet?” It’s a good summation of the work the Lord is doing in me. He gave me something real and personal pertaining to my passion for these girls. He’s growing in me a love and compassion for these girls to the point that I must do something about it. I must devote myself to prayer for these girls. And in the future, I am confident God is calling me to international missions for girls in the sex trafficking industry. The passion I have for these girls is so insanely consuming and intense that the heart behind it must be none other than from God himself.

Closing thoughts: I cannot tell you how important it is to know the gospel when dealing with emotionally trying situations like this. Yes, it was incredibly heart breaking and the compassion of the Lord spills out of me for those girls, but I was still able to find hope and joy in knowing who God is. Also, this world is a broken place because it’s filled with broken people. God is in the business of restoration of the broken images of Him in order to glorifying Himself. Every time something bad happens, like the Boston Marathon bombing for example, there are always Facebook statuses and tweets about how this world is a messed up place and question what is wrong with the world. Well, I’ll tell you. It started in Genesis 3 when we screwed up all the perfect harmony of the world. Don’t blame it on Adam and Eve, you and I would have done the same thing. We are all depraved with an evil nature (just take a look at Romans 3:9-18 if you don’t believe me). “BUT GOD showed his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8 emphasis added). So because Christ was the all-sufficient sacrifice for the entire world’s sin yesterday, today, and tomorrow (that is A LOT of sin), God is able to see His children as holy through the lens of His perfect son.

All this is to tell you, I saw the gospel through this situation and in that I find joy. There is hope in the goodness of God. There is hope in the justness God. There is hope in the sovereignty of God. I am not able to see the whole picture with time from beginning to end like God does. I’m not able to see why God allowed something like the Boston Marathon bombing to happen, but I also don’t see the world from a bird’s eye view, and I don’t see time from beginning to end. We have such a narrow view of our short time here on earth. I wholly believe whatever God does is just and whatever God does is good because He is good (Psalm 34:8) and He is just (Deut. 32:4).

The Four Biggest Things God Taught Me In Haiti (#1:His power)

1. His power

I’ve never been exposed to people blatant worship to the devil. Of course people indirectly do it all the time by worshipping things of creation and not the Creator, but I’ve never experience such open wickedness. I also think I have a subconscious fear of demonic activity because of scary movies I’ve watched about demon possessions. I strongly believe the devil uses seemingly “harmless” scary movies to instill in us fear of himself and make it appear as if he is more powerful than He. In all demon possession/scary movies, God’s power is displayed as insignificant and typically nonexistent, but this is a perverse perspective created by the father of lies. For example, in The Devil Inside a Catholic priest gets possessed by multiple demons. Someone who is supposed to be a man of God is controlled by the devil. Let me tell you what scripture says about this. “But the Lord is faithful. He will establish and guard you against the evil one” (2 Thessalonians 3:3). If you believe God’s word as wholly true then this contradicts what was portrayed in The Devil Inside, unless the man actually did not have the Holy Spirit indwelt within him (he professed to be of God’s people, but was not). The verse in 2 Thessalonians I just shared was written to the church of the Thessalonians, so it was written for God’s people. Those who are non-Christians do not have the guaranteed protection of God from the devil/demonic possession. However, if you do have a regenerated heart from God (you have truly been saved by Him) then you have the Spirit of God inside you. Do you really think the devil can be inside you as well? If you do, then you I question if you have the Spirit of God inside you. I say this because if you know the power of God that has radically changed your wicked heart, there should be no room for question that even the trim on His robe is infinitely greater than all darkness combined.

Also if God is all-knowing and powerful over everything, do you not believe that everything includes the devil? He allowed the devil put Job through hell on earth to make Job more like Himself. Almost all of us have heard Romans 8:28 which says, “And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.” For those who love God what’s “good” is not worldly success, but rather to be made more like Christ. How are we to become more like Christ in a cushy, comfortable life? We must go through the fire of sanctification, which includes opposition and obstacles put in front of us by the Adversary. “In this you rejoice, through now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith – more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire – may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ” (1 Peter 1:6-7).

There is another thing I want to mention to the children of God. This is very important. It’s something the Lord has taught me in the midst of spiritual warfare, and I believe He wants to share it with you. It is for certain that you will be attacked by the enemy. Ephesians 6:12 says, “For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.” However, regardless of if you feel the boldness of the Lord to rebuke Satan in the name of Jesus or if you’re weak and feel helpless, God is with you always. He’s with you always. Satan can scare you like he did to me in Haiti when I was lying in bed listening to voodoo ceremonies. Satan can take away all your possessions, your loved ones, your health (I am speaking of what happened to Job here), but He cannot separate you from the love of God. “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, nor angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 8:38-39). The devil can hover over you at night, he can shout at you, he can scare you in your dreams, he can whisper wicked thoughts into your ear, but he CANNOT have possession of the children of God; YOU ARE OWNED BY GOD. The great and holy God, creator of all, is in you and ultimately holds all the power. For me this is comforting because I don’t always recognize the authority inside me that I have to stand up to the Adversary, but I know at the end of the day, God has victory – He has already won, and I am owned by Him.

When I came back to America from Haiti, I had a greater sensitivity to the darkness and brokenness around me. It was as if, previous to this trip, I was blind to the fact that the devil was seriously at work in America. We can’t just ignore the fact that he’s at work around us – it is good to be aware of this. However, do not become distracted or fearful because of this, but rather always keep your eyes focused on the light that is Christ. I think of it like this: there is darkness all around me – it’s not just the absence of light, but the darkness is the wickedness and evil that surrounds me – but there is a lantern that never goes out to guide my path. I cling to that light because I need it to lead me through the darkness. I constantly follow it, taking every step toward that light. "In him (Jesus) was life, and the life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it." (John 1:4-5)

There are two things of encouragement I want those who love God to take away from this:

1.      I encourage you to reflect on the fruitfulness of watching scary movies and movies about demon possessions. Please recognize that the devil has a huge stronghold in entertainment media – it’s very subtle, and we typically don’t recognize it’s him, but that’s what makes it so dangerous. Are the movies you watching putting bad thoughts and images into your head? What good is going to come out of watching this? Is it glorifying to God?

“Therefore put away all filthiness and rampant wickedness and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls.” (James 1:21)

2.      God is good. He owns you and lives inside of you. You have authority over the darkness through the power in you. “But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light” (1 Peter 2:9). Praise God! What an encouraging verse. We have been called out of that darkness into his marvelous light.

3.      Recognize the power in prayer. You are praying to the one who reigns over all! Both your creator and your Father.

Haiti (3/15/13): There is a Time for Everything

We awoke to moist soil and grey clouds lining the sky.

After eating breakfast, we strapped on our life jackets and headed over to the dock to take a boat over to Kappa Fu. Kappa Fu is a small, remote village; it is the poorest of the poor in the world. Jody explained the poverty of the village as something you would see in National Geographic documentaries and magazines. I thought the Mole was remote, but apparently Kappa Fu is way more isolated than the Mole.

In two small fishing-sized boats, we ventured out into the deep blue sea whilst the choppy waves rocked us back and forth as the wind blew, and rain sprinkled over us. Before we got on the boats, most of took Dramamine, which is a medicine for motion sickness with a side effect of drowsiness; most of us were put to sleep during the boat ride by the Dramamine running through our blood stream, and the soothing rocking of the boat. We sailed out for about 45 minutes then had to head back because the waters were too violent; because of the choppy waves, we wouldn’t have been able to unload from the boats. So we saw Kappa Fu only from but a distance.

When we got back to Jody’s house, the Dramamine was still going strong, so I slept, woke up for lunch, packed my suitcase, then slept, and woke up for dinner. The medicine just really got to me. I honestly wish I hadn’t of taken it, but I suppose I needed the rest. I really wanted to play with the orphans for a little; I felt like I wasted my last day in Haiti. But I know God is sovereign and working regardless of if I sleep for a day or not.

As I write this, I am sitting on the deck where we have our meals and meetings. It is breaching midnight as I sit and listen to the sounds surrounding me; Jody’s children chuckle, my friends chatter and laugh, and behind me there is an argument about the rules of a card game going on.

At 2a.m. we will leave the Mole, in trucks this time (our bus was too beat up to make it back), and drive to Port Au Prince to stay the night in a hotel and flight out to America the following morning. Well, maybe we will leave at 2 a.m. – it could be more like 3 or 4 a.m.; Haitian time is very difference from fast pace, go, go, go, American time.

As I reflect on this past week, I marvel at the work God has done in my heart and in my team member’s hearts. I praise God for the people on this deck right now; for their deep love for Jesus, the encouragement they are to me, and how God is making them more like Christ every day. I could not think of a better team to share my experience in Haiti with. We are all so different, but the same in that Christ lives inside us. My heart is soft for each and every one of them.

Regarding going back to the States, I don’t want to. I love it here. I love the basic living style, the people, the atmosphere, Haitian time – everything about Haiti. I am dreading going back to a people obsessed with electronics and continuous communication; a country that has everything a person would ever need, but so much emptiness. God has definitely taught me during my time in Haiti that it doesn’t matter how much or how little you have; it means absolutely nothing if you don’t have Jesus. Matt Chandler, in his book the Explicit Gospel, says, “Making people comfortable before an eternity in hell is wasteful.” However, as much as I don’t want to go back to a nation full of materialism and consumerism that is where God is calling me in this season of my life. I will serve Him with joy in Haiti, and I will serve Him with joy in the States. I am called to be just loving, just as serving, just as intentional, and just as passionate about sharing the gospel in the States as I have been in Haiti. If God has the potential to use me in the way He did in Haiti, He can do it in Lubbock, TX.

“For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven”-Ecclesiastes 3:1

Haiti (3/14/13): He Who Is In You Is Greater

Today we got to choose if we wanted to do hut to hut evangelism, VBS, or construction. I was in the hut to hut group with Eric, Josh, Mandy, and Ryan. We walked uphill behind Jody’s house where we first visited a hut with a few women and lots of children. Ryan and I spoke with a woman; Josh and Eric showed the kids card tricks, and Josh shared his testimony with them (he told them the card tricks were not real and showed them how to do them because voodoo/magic type things are a big part of the Haitian culture). When Ryan and I first started talking to the woman, it was slightly uncomfortable and awkward, but I knew regardless of how we were feeling, we were still called to share the gospel with this woman. I prayed with her and then the Spirit started flowing. Both Ryan and I kept pulling out Scripture and giving her words of truth and encouragement from the Spirit. It was tight. There wasn’t much reaction or feedback, but God is sovereign and if anything, we saw God creating a greater heart of obedience in us. The Lord is teaching me to listen to His voice and do what He says when He says to do it, whether there’s tangible fruit or not. I think it’s important to not see the fruit of your labor sometimes because then God trusts that you will obey Him even when you can’t see what He’s doing. I believe that’s most of the time. I know He’s always working around me. I just can’t see it, or maybe I don’t ask the Lord to open my eyes to it enough. Regardless, it is God’s harvest, not ours – He will show you what He wants and leave unseen what He wants.

At the second house, Mandy and I washed the girls’ and women’s feet and painted their nails.  It is such an intimate thing to be able to serve someone by washing their feet. I love being able to clean their feet and wipe the dirt off with my skirt and make their nails look pretty with a turquoise nail polish that shimmers in the sunlight. The point of washing feet is not really so they can have clean feet that will get dirty in an hour; it’s serving others in a lowly, humbling way like Jesus did with the disciples. It is actually becoming a servant. While this was going on, the boys were playing games and running races. Then Ryan started preaching the gospel according to races to all these boys gathered around; it was awesome – I definitely saw the boldness of the Holy Spirit in Him. We went back, ate lunch, bought Haiti souvenirs at market day, then rested and relaxed at the beach.  

The youth conference started at 3 p.m. Our group performed the “Everything” by Lifehouse skit. In the beginning of the skit, God created a girl; He showed her all His beautiful creation, and they danced (the skit is all acting to a song without speaking). She was happy with Jesus then she began looking for fulfillment in the world from gossip to drinking to sex to voodoo. Those sins blocked the little girls from getting back to Jesus when she grew tired of the things of this world and found emptiness in it. Eventually, she cries out to God, and Jesus intervenes and fights all the sin off. It’s very powerful when Jesus stands behind her, and the sin that once kept her from him, flees. I almost started crying because the performance was such an intensely beautiful picture of the gospel. Those who acted in the skit on our team did well. I was super proud of them. Abbey and David spoke following the skit and did an awesome job. I loved listening to them speak truth. I led the girls’ 10-15 small group again. It was a large group – around 30 girls – and they were shy, not willing to open up. I can understand not wanting to open up in that large of a group with white people speaking through a translator to you.

We ate pizza for dinner! It was delicious. Now there’s a voodoo ceremony going on. They started at 9 p.m. tonight, which is really early for them. They are dedicated. They really just want your fear though, and they want to feel control though fear – or rather the devil does, but the only fear in me right now is the fear of the Lord. I pray the devil has no stronghold over me, and I cast out any fear that is not of God. It is so silly. They beat their drums and chant to the devil to spare their lives or whatever, when God is the only one who can save their lives. The devil just wants to kill, steal, and destroy us all. The Lord brings life and life to the fullest. The craziest thing is we see these people who participated in the ceremonies every day out on the street and greet them. Not that we know who it actually is, but it some of the people we see daily. Another wild thing, I am just like them – just as evil, just as wicked. Although I’ve never worshiped the devil directly, by glorifying or worshiping things not of God, I might as well have. Just because evil and brokenness is more tangible in Haiti, doesn't mean the same, if not more, exists in America. We are all evil. We are all in desperate need of God. He is our only hope. He is our salvation. Through Him, we find life. Through Him, I find the comfort and peace to say “Amen” and go to bed in the midst of distance banging of pots and pans and chanting. In Him, I find refuge and freedom to peacefully sleep without feat because the Spirit of God is with me and in me. PRAISE GOD!

My closing thought: The devil is real, yes. Demons are real, yes. There is some power in evil. BUT GOD is real. Angels are real. And He ultimately holds all the power. He sees and knows the evil that goes on. He is not blind to it. In fact, we cause most of it. When you wholly fear God – not fear in the way you’re worried He will strike you down at any moment, but fear Him with a reverential awe He deserves, there is no room for fear of anything satanic. God is good, and He is with me. There is nothing else in all of creation that matters.

Another thought: Sometimes I think about how much more spiritual demons are than most professing “Christians” in America. James 2 says the demons believe there is one God and shudder. The demons tremble knowing who God is. Many claim to know God, and have no fear in their bones of Him. In fact, Paul talks about that in Romans 8. How is it that demons recognize and understand the power of God more than we sometimes do? How much more should those who are genuinely sons and daughters of the King, recognize and understand His power?  

“Little children, you are from God and have overcome them, for he who is in you is greater than he who is in the world.”-1 John 4:4